Franklin: Winston's on a Roll... literally

I was minding my own business a few days ago, when I heard some sort of commotion coming from the stairway landing. The sounds of ripping, tearing, snarling, and some heavy clunking against the heating vent and the circulating fan met my ears.

I investigated.

What is that racket?

Peeking below, I spied something pretty alarming: a massive pile of the remains of not just one, but TWO rolls of Costco's best, littering the floor. I proceeded to check out the situation at closer range.

Hmmmm... I suspect Hurricane Winston

Winston sauntered in, polishing his claws against his chest fur. “Guess I told them who was boss, eh?” he asked proudly, as he flopped down amongst the dregs of his earlier activities. I calmly explained that I thought he was going to be in BIG trouble.

This is srsly bad, bro.

“You’re not planning on telling, are you?” he asked, eyes narrowing. “Well, no,” I said, "but if it comes to ‘Who was involved in this Bad Kitty Behavior™?' I am not going to take the fall!”

Upon that, Win launched at me in a fit of fury, tail bushed, ears back.

You would tell? Prepare to die!

Now, my sibling outweighs me by 50%, and on a normal day, you might expect me to emerge the non-victor in any sort of mano a mano confrontation. However, exercising exceptional battle strategy -- greatly enhanced by the fact that my assailant was exhausted from his earlier shredding exercises -- I soon pinned Win to the floor. Taking pity on the silly fellow, I told him I’d try to help cover up the whole thing.

Hold still, will you? I have a plan!

When next our humans found us, we were innocently napping in the kitty tree. When asked about the incident, neither of us had a word to say!

Say what?
We've been sleeping here all afternoon!

Moral of Story: Deny outright, and count on your cute face and innocent blue eye to get you out of nearly any fix.